End of Service

So I haven't made an entry in about 5 months. Choops.

And all of a sudden everything is over. I'm working half days now, to make sure I have time to take care of things like applying to jobs and closing accounts and packing and cleaning. I've gone through a lot of looking inward and outward in the past few months, deciding to do what I can without making stress for myself and getting stressed anyways.

I'll be leaving Saint Lucia in two weeks.

And there's still so much to do.

Let's see where this goes.

School Days

Last week I subbed for a Grade 1 class. I hate subbing, but thankfully it was just an hour and a half, and the teacher gave me two assignments for them out of workbooks most of the students had in their desks.

Dialect differences are fun to play with.

Kermarl: Miss, Jeanie kicking me.
Jervehn: Miss me too.
Me: Who?
Jervehn: Miss, Jeanie.
Me: Bring her here.
Jeanie: Yes, Miss?
Me: Jeanie, what kind of animal kicks?
Jeanie thinks for a bit, then says: A horse?
Me: Yes, horses kick, and so do jackasses. Are you a jackass?
Jeanie: No?
Me: Do you want to be a jackass?
Jeanie: No, Miss.
Me: Then do not kick. Little girls do not kick, jackasses kick. Tell Jervehn and Kermarl that you are sorry.

----------------------------

Today at VF Primary I called in Joshua for a one-on-one session. Just as we were starting, he said he was hungry.

"I didn't have break, I lost my dollar."
"Do you have lunch?"
"No, Miss."
"Does anyone share their food with you?"
"No, Miss."
"So you didn't have break and you don't have lunch?"
"No, Miss, I lost my dollar."
"But you have gum, where did that come from?"
"Miss it's a plum.*"
"Someone shared it with you?"
"Yes, Miss."
*sigh* "Well let's look at these sounds."
"I'm hungry, Miss."
"Ok, Joshua, I have some bread with cheese and mustard. You'll come in when lunch starts and you can take it."
"Yes, Miss."

*A "plum" here is a very small fruit that has little more substance to it than a stick of gum, and it certainly doesn't last as long.

He did come in during lunch, when I was setting up a chessboard for a game with Zea. I took the bread with cheese and a banana. He was about to unwrap the sandwich, but I asked him to go outside with it. I don't let any children eat in the Resource Room. Instead, he stayed to learn to play chess. He played one game with Nabila, who helped him with moves, then I showed him pawn game.

He played black, and he beat me.

Pawn game lacks other pieces, and the goal is just to get to the other side of the board. White has the advantage, since that player makes the first move. Joshua had never played chess before.

Joshua is the academically weakest student I work with at that school. A few months ago he finally got the connection between sounds and the words they make. We have 11 sounds of the alphabet down solid, and we're working on 2 more now. He still has trouble with numbers between 11-50. I'm currently teaching him the difference between first, middle, and last. He is in Grade 5.

Joshua probably does not have a learning disability--just a severe disadvantage. He lives in Shanty-town, and often stays home from school because his mother doesn't have money for him to buy lunch. She might be illiterate herself, I don't remember. He says he has one book at home. He is the sweetest kid I work with, and even when he's hungry or tired or sick or all three, if he's in the room with me he tries his hardest.

(Names are definitely changed in this post.)

Long time

So I've been really busy the past few months.

VFASP is going pretty well. New kids that came consistently, and new rules and structure. It has helped. Last week I finally completed one of the seven goals I set for myself at Mid-Service Training: I compiled two binders for VFASP, one of daily maintenance things like attendance and one of resources and such.

I'm working more now with the Special Needs teachers at VF Infant and Primary, figuring out how to help them do their jobs as efficiently as possible. Sometimes it's a challenge, especially working with people that have extremely different expectations of a Special Needs teacher's role.

Catherding is going pretty well. The kindergarten students started typing their names. I really need to type up all the lessons for that computer skills for non-readers. That will be one more thing to cross of my list of MST goals.

On top of regular work, I have started getting my act together to look for jobs. Writing resumes, completing applications online, contacting references, etc. One week I did that almost non-stop at home. It was exhausting.

In addition to work and future work, I've been planning for Berney's parents to visit. They will be staying with me, so I've been cleaning plenty, and both Bern and I have been making and remaking plans to ensure they get a good taste of St. Lucia.

I have a lot of pictures, but Berney has stolen all of them. So I'll post them when I get a chance.

blugh

I'll update soon, I promise. Sorry for the long pause. I've been super busy lately.

Taking a couple VF Primary girls to a Chess Workshop in Castries

Minority Experience

Part 1

Last Monday, January 18th, I checked with the music teacher at the school to see if he could take the children for music at 4pm. He was packing up to go home already, so I needed to come up with a music and theatre combo for the group.

A few minutes later, as children started coming in for the After School Programme, Zoya came up and showed me that she finished a half-page I asked the kids to write about what it means to be a good leader. She wrote about Dr. Martin Luther King, and had even done a little more research about him. I looked it over, then told her that today was in fact MLK day in the US. Her smile got bigger and her eyes lit up. "Really?" I'm sure my eyes lit up at the same time, because I saw an immediate solution.

I asked her if she would like to read it for the group when it was time for the theatre session, since we had to change plans a little. She agreed, and I made a mental note to come up with some songs we could sing.

When 4pm (the scheduled time for creative activities) rolled around, I introduced the topic. Many of them had heard of Dr. King, and a few even knew what he did. Zoya read her piece, followed by applause. I then talked a little more about what Dr. King meant for people in America. It was difficult and improvised, but I did my best to connect the story back to their understanding of their own history.

The US and St. Lucia both experienced slavery. I talked about how Lincoln set the slaves free with the Emancipation Proclamation. Here they celebrate Emancipation Day on August 1, when the UK freed its slaves. I talked about the struggle of blacks and animosity between races, and how Dr. King and other civil rights leaders used peaceful protests to demand their rights.

One boy said that the white people shot Dr. King. At this point it was extremely important to me to clarify the extent and limitations of racism in the US. I told them that there were white abolitionists before slavery was over, and that there were many white people supporting and working for civil rights for all races in the 20th century. I knew it would be a touchy topic, but it worked and the kids saw how strongly I felt about it. We ended by singing "This Little Light of Mine."

Goal 2 achieved.



Part 2

I've mentioned this before on the blog, but serving as a PCV has given me the kind of perspectives I was seeking. One that I hadn't given much thought to before leaving but that hit me in the face as soon as I arrived was a real minority perspective.

Some of you reading know that I identify as Hispanic, but I'm such a guera that practically nobody would describe me as such. Even my claim to it is tenuous, especially when I'm not in the Southwest. My mom was not from Mexico as it is known today, but rather from south Texas. She is also a guera, meaning she has fair skin and her hair is not pitch black like the typical image of the ethnicity. When I say my mom is Mexican, I suppose I mean Chicana--a word not used in Texas. She and her siblings grew up speaking English because her father wanted them to have that advantage, but that fair skin and no Spanish accent didn't mean she was (or is) never discriminated against. While I haven't had to overcome racial inequalities myself, I embrace my family's history and culture.

In that sense and that sense only I am a minority in the United States. In St. Lucia I am absolutely a minority. I live here, and endure assumptions about me from all sides. People who don't know me or haven't seen me often enough assume I'm a tourist. If I'm lucky they think I'm a medical student. They assume I don't know prices for things, that I don't know their Kweyol language (which is mostly true), that I don't know how to get around, and worst of all that I have a lot of money.

I'm also met with a lot of interest from people who wouldn't naturally ask questions of a Lucian they didn't know. Yesterday Berney and I went to Sandy Beach. As we were packing up to go, a girl of about 16 (I guess) came over and asked us our names. Well, she asked Berney his name, and then me mine. We each hesitated but told her. She wandered back to her friends who continued walking along. No reason, it seemed, just curiosity.

By the time we got to into VF, it was after 6, so we stood out by the beginning of the Vieux Fort-Laborie highway instead of the bus stand. About ten minutes went by before an Augier bus came by for us to get on, and as sometimes happens on weekends, the back of the bus was filled with rowdy young men on their way home after a day of drinks.

The gason (dude) sitting next to Berney had let rum get the better of him, and he loudly harassed us. Nothing really aggressive, and nothing to the extent that I expected bodily or property harm, but it was pretty irritating. His friends tried to get him off the topic, but he would have none of it. One gason behind us tried to apologize to us by saying "I love tourists" a few times. By the time we were by the mall, the soule (drunkard) next to us was lightly knocking (in the American sense of the word) Berney on the shoulder as he got madder.

At the mall two girls got on the bus, and one of the young men told Soule to knock it off while the girls were on the bus. That didn't last long. He continued to threaten us and tap (again, American meaning) Berney on the arm and head, speaking in Kweyol with the key words I was waiting for: fanm, blan, etc. I leaned over and told him "Eh gason, ki te nou bat mi se nou!"

"What?" He leaned over to hear me better.

I told him very firmly and angrily, "Ki te nou, bat mi se nou!"

That shut him up for a bit, muttering under his breath sexual threats against me and violent threats against Berney. At least he stopped tapping Berney. His friends were freaked out, one of them saying "Dey undastand ah language, gason!"

Soule turned his attention to the girl in front of him. I'm not sure exactly what precipitated, but he started a small fight between them and the girls shouted for the bus driver to pull over. They declared they would not pay, they must get off. The driver, caring more about his pay than the safety or comfort of his passengers, got out and demanded that they or the fellows on the bus pay for them, but the girls were already walking up the road.

While the door was still open, Soule's friends tried to get him out of the van. He resisted strongly, and one of the guys with him took a 4 foot long two-by-four from a pile nearby. Not even a real scuffle, and the drunk man was finally pulled out and a couple of his friends stayed with him. The driver got back to his seat, picked up the girls, and continued on.

Not too far down, the leader of the young men, called Blacks, said "Stopping at de gap, driva," and the remaining group went down from the bus. Blacks apologized to us as he got out, but I told him "Thank you." We were safely at my house not much longer.

Talking about it afterward, Berney said he was glad he was the one sitting next to Soule, but I felt awful that he had to go through it. There had been two other seats on the bus we could have taken, not next to each other; we decided it was better that we were seated together even though we were closer to the rowdy bunch.

We know, though, that the aggression wasn't because it was us, but because he was drunk and we were different. Had two Lucian girls been sitting in our seats, I expect something similar would happen. I'm very thankful that nothing further precipitated, but I also know that there's not really a way to avoid the same situation in the future.

I wish I could blend in anywhere I go, but I'm not a chameleon. Here I will continue to stick out like a big pasty sore thumb.

Best Compliment Ever

I was leaving the After School Programme and a group of girls were ahead of me. Three from the programme, one was not.

"Miss, Miss, Naomi saying you have flak backside!"
Naomi says crossly, "Miss I not saying that, uh."
"Miss, she saying it foh true!"
"Miss not true uh!"
I tell them, "Hey hold on let's talk about this. I'm not mad."
"Miss, Naomi say you have flak backside."
"Did you say that?"
"Yes miss."
"What does it mean?" I ask.
"Miss it meaning 'flat.'"
"Miss like not round backside."
"Ok, well it's true. I have flak backside then. Why is that?"
"Miss when you bend down you have flak backside."
"Well there are two reasons for that. One is that I wearing pants that ah a little too big for me, they not tight on me like some women weh."
"Miss yuh pants too big on you?"
"Yes, but also I'm white and many white people have smaller backside than many Lucians."
"Miss, Asians having flak backside too eh!" I was surprised the girl did not say "chiny," as most people here refer to Asians.
"Miss, where you from?"
"I'm from the United States."
A few ask at the same time, "New York?!"
"No, I'm from Texas."
"Miss, how you having so many moles?" The same girl that said "Asians." I was surprised she knew the word for mole, too. I've often heard younger children call them "buttons."
"Well I was born like that, with feh skin and moles."
Naomi looks up and asks, "Miss, are you a tourism?"
"Eh eh, tourist, Naomi!" the other girls correct her, "Tourist, tourist!"
"I'm not a tourist; I live heh and I wuhk heh."
"Miss wheh you livin'?"
"I livin' Augier."
"Miss looking like tourist, eh."
"But that's only because I'm white. Do I dress like a tourist?" I want to challenge their assumptions about white people.
"No, miss."
"What do tourists weh?" I ask.
"Miss dey wearing shoht skuhts an' fing."
Naomi asks, "But Miss if you from United State how come you not talking yahnking?"
"Talking yahnking?" I ask, "What that mean?"
"Miss you not sounding like you from United States ey." Naomi explains.
I smile. This is what I've been working on, a secret to me as much as anyone. "Well I livin' St. Lucia ovuh a yeh now, I pick up the accent."

They asked a few more questions, but our conversation was cut short because a teacher that livin' near me came outside and was starting her car. I got a ride home.




I work with children ages 5-11 on basic literacy. Much of this involves learning and reviewing the sounds letters make. I found out over a year ago it was useless to try and teach them the sounds they have in American English. So the sounds are easy to get right. The dialect came later. Slowly I tried incorporating different phrases and words that would make me better understood by the young children. My classroom management skills are improving, but a lot of it is just the fact that kids understand what I'm saying now.

I look white, and maybe it's something that my students think about often. I don't, however, but I do take advantage of cultural education. Maybe I need to introduce real flour tortillas to my students so I can explain my moles better.

Wow I suck at updating

So I'm nearly at the end of my Christmas break, and I'll return to school next week. During the break I've gotten a lot of things done, especially in the kitchen.

Berney and I put presents under my tree, although we haven't received any of the other packages sent from family and such.

I've been staying in my apartment most of the break, goofing around but also getting some things done that advance some of the goals I listed in the last post. Unfortunately my mom won't be able to visit, so I need to come up with something else for that bit.

Though it's been nice to have lots of free time and have friends over and visit friends during the week, I'm (as usual) looking forward to getting back into a work schedule.